I’ve been stewing this week over the choices I’ve been making on a daily basis. Some are “good” (i.e. moral, ethical, healthy, or beneficial), some are “bad” (i.e. immoral, unethical, bad for my health, or detrimental in every way), and some choices I didn’t even realize I was making at the time.
We act out of habit, and out of comfort. It’s understandable. We are human creatures, most of us. This year I want to resemble something closer to a human being. Someone who exists to embrace the spirit of living, to breathe, to expand.
I realize that this cannot be a New Year’s resolution. First of all, it’s a little late for such a sentiment, and secondly, I don’t want to doom this idea to failure.
So here’s my plan: I am going to be beautiful everyday.
Sounds silly, I know. But I’m not talking about covering up my dark circles and wearing a lovely shade of blush while taking out the trash (although this would certainly go a long way), I mean that I want to make choices and behave in such a way that I feel beautiful everyday.
I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of feeling like a failure when it comes to being green. Yes, I recycle. Yes, I buy organic. Yes, I use ugly lightbulbs. But I know it’s not enough. It’s not enough to be a green makeup artist, either. I can preach to you day and night about throwing out your chemical-laden, cancer-causing, planet-polluting makeup, and I can publicly endorse or eschew companies that claim to be green, but that’s not going to make the world more beautiful.
We, as women, must strive to act beautifully if we want to feel beautiful. And when we act beautifully, the world becomes beautiful.
What does that mean, to “act beautifully”? For me, it means I don’t want to cheat on myself anymore. I want to live with integrity–instead of this thing, this replacement for integrity which is so pervasive–this PC-ness of the green movement, this Modern Decency Law (the acknowledgement that the world is collapsing, and it is our duty to behave responsibly so as not to hasten our own demise), which many folks follow to the letter, ignoring the Spirit altogether. I’ve encountered many “ugly” environmentalists. When there’s a law, whether real or imagined, there are always loopholes, and it is our nature to obey social laws while exploiting the loopholes. We find ways to appear to do the right thing for all the wrong reasons.
What I want to do is ignore the law, and stop looking for loopholes! I want to act from a place which supersedes civilian code. Instead of trying to do the “RIGHT” thing, I want to do the BEAUTIFUL thing.
I believe beauty can save the world. But that’s not my aim. I will champion beauty, for its own sake. I will strive to act as beauty would dictate. (Which will prove difficult–I have a mean temper, and a righteous indignation that creeps about looking for places to sink its teeth). I’m also profoundly lazy, a fact which I attempt to disguise by being “productive”.
No more. My only mission now is to live beautifully. And busy bees are not beautiful. I will live with purpose. This probably means taking my time when I do things. I find that when I hurry (I’m a last minute kind of girl) I inevitably cut corners. Not beautiful.
You’ve been there: you’re shopping for something or other, the store is jam packed with people, you’re in a hurry. You don’t see what you really want, so you settle for something else–because IT WILL DO. Aren’t you tired of that? Aren’t you sick of making do?
It’s one thing to “make do with what you have”….a nice way to reduce consumption and live simply, or creatively; it’s quite another thing to “make do” WHILE consuming!! To “make do” because you ran out of time. To “make do” because you just want to get it done. To “make do” because you’re ready to get married and he happens to be the guy you’re dating. To “make do” because you don’t know if you’ll ever be able to make a living as an artist, and besides, middle management pays better.
Let us stop MAKING DO. Let us simply BE BEAUTIFUL.
We can do this by first examining our lifestyles, and becoming aware of times when we act in hollow ways. When we slight ourselves and each other– you’ve felt this before, a kind of pinging or aching in your gut. Maybe you’ve recently decided to eat at home more often (for your health, your budget, or to enhance your sensual experience), but you’re ravenously hungry, you’re tired, and there’s a mediocre Chinese restaurant around the corner….(That was me, last night). So how do I feel today? More beautiful, for satisfying my insta-craving for sodium heavy fried noodles? Nope. I actually feel a little dirty.
I love treating myself, but I gain more satisfaction from experiences CHOSEN in the light of day (in a calm, detached manner), rather than FUMBLED for in the dark (when I’m more likely to make do, especially given a low blood sugar scenario).
And how about you? What are your weak spots? When do you find yourself settling for less-than-beautiful?
I intend to spend more time writing about this idea of Beauty (capital B). It is an intellectual and spiritual concept as old as civilization itself, and yet, somewhere along the way we became simple minded, distracted consumers. We are allowing ourselves to be “sold” beauty. But Beauty (capital B) isn’t for sale. It is our task to manifest it.
I hope that we can share our ideas on this topic: Please write in! I welcome your comments, experiences, and insights as we explore the path of Beauty of together. I will continue to post product reviews as well as cosmetic beauty tips, but I am now firm in my resolution to preach Beauty over beauty.
Step One: Identifying our “Making Do’s”